Lifestyle

Things I didn’t realise until I was 18

I’m turning 19 tomorrow which is so crazy to even think about, I feel like I’ve just left school when really that was 3 years ago! The last year has flown by and sitting here in my last few hours of being 18 I couldn’t help but realise how much I’ve learnt this year. Some of these things I noticed happened as soon as I reached adulthood, and some I’ve only fairly recently noticed. 

Things I didn’t realise until I was 18

Less make-up is more

Ever since I was 13 I’ve had a passion for make-up and been very creative with the different looks you can create so easily, but up until about 6 months ago I relied on heavy eye-liner to form my everyday look. I mean, it looks good when applied right but looking back it really wasn’t appropriate for everyday wear and I definitely got looks for the wrong reason. Nowadays things seem to have taken a U turn and I wear more make-up in the form of foundation and bronzer than anything else, namely to brighten my appearance in a less panda looking fashion…

You are in charge of your happiness

I think this may have been my main lesson over the last year or so, if you rely on other people for your happiness then you are never going to truly be happy when you’re alone. Also, if you put your happiness in the hands of someone who is flaky and a part-time friend then you are setting yourself up to get hurt. When you think of happiness you think of days out with your friends or quiet nights in with your family watching a film, and however happy those things make you it’s really important to be happy in your own company. I don’t understand people who can’t ever spend a night in on their own, I personally need to unwind on my own after a long day; I’d feel like I was constantly entertaining if I never had a moment to myself! 

Owning your own decisions

I feel like up until I was 18 I was screaming at the world, blaming everyone else for my mistakes. It just hit me as I was treated more like an adult than a child that I make my decisions, my life can go anyway I like it to because I call the shots. This also means people can’t try to shame you for decisions you make that they don’t agree with, which people will still try to do. “I can’t believe you’re still speaking to him”, “You were a mess last night why did you drink so much?”. Listen up okay, I’m speaking to him still because I want to. I drank so much because um I wanted to. People hate being judged but can’t see when they’re judging others, I do it, you do it. Difference is, when I mess up – I can freely admit it and move on. People who judge you on one decision you made are small minded and aren’t worth your time, there are only two people you need to prove yourself to: you and your boss. 

Working hard isn’t a bad thing

I can admit that I’ve been a lazy ass for many years of my life. I made zero effort in school and minimal effort in my first year of college, despite it being a career I wanted at the time. When it came to my second year at college I was determined to start being productive and start achieving, turns out I underestimated myself and could’ve got a higher mark if I’d only aimed higher. Third year of college and I pulled my finger out, actually started working hard and aiming higher which leaded to me getting higher grades than I expected and feeling genuinely proud of myself for all my hard work. I almost cringe into the depths of hell when I hear the words ‘nerd’ and ‘geek’ – you can sit in a park with your benefit scrounger friends getting high into the early hours of the morning but I can guarantee these ‘nerds’ will end up being your boss one day when you ditch your shitty friends for a real life. 

You can’t make someone love you

This one should be a given but hell, we still try. Sometimes you meet someone and they change your life, they flip your world upside down and make you a different person in the process. You’d think you would do the same to their life, but ehh it doesn’t work like that sadly. You can be besotted with someone but no matter how much time you spend with then, try to impress them by being more relevant to them or doing things out of character to spend time with them, it won’t happen. You aren’t promised that every person you’re going to fall for will love you back, no matter how painful it is. 

Family is damn important

I love my family and have always loved my family, but for years I felt like they were holding me back from being the real me with a long list of rules and things I wasn’t allowed to do, places I wasn’t allowed to go. Hell, I still disobeyed and did those things – resulting in some pretty bad memories and mistakes I’ve only really just forgiven myself for but still, I felt like I was controlled and I hated that. It’s only now I realise it really was the best route for me, I wouldn’t be in the good place I am now without those rules in place back then. As soon as I turned 18 I could do whatever I wanted, come home at whatever time I liked etc but I guess I’d just learnt to be respectful by that point. Family is important, no matter how you’re feeling.

Not all guys like skinny girls

Curves are sexy. Some guys like skinny girls, some guys don’t. That’s it. It’s that simple.

Don’t sell yourself short

I can’t even count the number of times I’ve been given a compliment and I’ve replied with “it’s not that good“, “I can do better“, “I rushed it, it’s crap” etc. We live in a society where compliments aren’t given as often as they should, embrace them – they’ll add a little something to your day.

I’m not half as bad as what you’ve been told,
Lauren
x

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